*Put Down The Bible And Pick Up Your Clothes

Love Letter or

How I Learned To Hate The Pretty girls

Dear Creator,
Benevolent stranger,
Bearded man in the sky,
Krishna,
Pot-bellied meditator,

Take a rib and my hubris

bring to me such a creator

bring forth someone to create for me.
I want a painter

a writer

and a music maker

I’ve created enough and I want to be read to.

I want to fall and

Remake this cliché sin.

I’m done with pleasing you
Just a moan,

closed doors behind me.

Pervert?
How dare you.
You have no right and I will not forgive you.
To sleep with is beautiful, a comfort

and love is what you aren’t.
I will not forgive you
Own your mistake

own what you took

own what was taken from you.

It’s a f*ck.
You’re a fling.
I hope this makes you remember
You don’t have a choice now
The rest of the poem lies is in your head.
You made your mistake, now lie with him.
______________________

If I said I knew what exactly brought this poem on I'd be lying, it's 3:48 am and I am/was working on a paper and the beginning popped into my head and then took a sudden angry turn. I really like this one though. You've been getting a lot of songs off Anberlin's album "Cities" and I promise I'll get some different music to you, I think I'll put a Smiths song in this post below. I apologize for the lack of posts and oddity of the last ones. I usually don't apologize for oddity (That'd be a cool poem title).

Godspeed,
C.B. 

If A Stranger Turns Up Missing His Song Is My Confession

Repression & Regression
It’s proof

This poem

It’s written

In an un-holy scrawl

God’s finger on the wall

I’ll find myself hanging

on the string that held the world
I’m done and gone

the devil’s got my lucid, lost mind.
checking a watch and my mind

full of a lusty loss
belief in where I’d end up

is a strange thing

to believe in the failure of yourself.
an undermining confidence

I’m not strong enough

Drifting
along a wine filled river

Towards a tree where I’ll make my decision. 

I must move on.
I must move on.
I must move on.
I must move on.
I have to move on.
I have to move on.
I have to move on.
Have to move on.
I have to forget the past
forget the past
It's a blur but it still hunts me
It's a blur but it still haunts me.
It's crystal clear. I lied.
I lied and I need to forget my mistkes
I lied and I need to forge my mistake
I lied and I need to free my mistakes.


I'll be honest, I need to forget my mistakes.

Godspeed,
C.B.

*Benson Hedges/Opposites at that.

I’m terrified you’ll leave me

and you’re not even here yet.

I’m terrified you’ll leave me

And you’re not even here yet.
I said it again,
I think about it more than once,
It’s a common theme.
It’s almost happened.
A common dream,

See my dreams taunt me,

The give me what I can’t have

And stop me from getting what might be.
It’s a disease a sickness

Narcolepsy at its finest

Fall asleep mind conversation

Mid flirt

Wake up sad

Disappointed

Broken

Over a dream,

And a lucid one at that.

I drop names, and memories

Hoping to forget this

The title of this

Screaming sobbing

I babble about uncertainty

And I hate what I know is true

It’s gone

And it’s a dream now.
We shape it.
We taste it and it’s salty.

Like the way her tears taste.

Tough not to quote Panic!

They seem to get things right.

A far thing

A insomniacs fling

With a girl with gorgeous eyes

Stuck in a world of my creation. 

Graveyard Billings
I took a step back.
If this is a ledge calling out
I pray.
They say two or three gathered

But I am one.

So it’s as none,

A robed man ignores the individual.            

Wake up.

Your baptism was lie.
Wake up.
It was just water.

Wake up.
I’m cynical.
Wake up.
You don’t know me.

Listen as your ears bleed
Watch your eyes fall out of your skull

Douse a monk and light a match

Generally surgery forewarnings.
You don’t smoke do you?
And sex? But of course, it’s a natural thing.
Oh no? And drinking? But you’re only 17

You see it’s a mad man’s world

But with a fake ID

It’s allowed

Permitted

Alcoholically acceptable

and clinically insane.

Drink to get drunk

For the fish it’s to breathe

And the smoke?

For your lungs and eyes for TV

Jump.
I can guarantee what’s on the other side

Is far more interesting than the concrete.

Refraction of Our Nights

You want to see a city

or that of it’s people?

Stand up on a ledge

Or walk,

2 or 3 am 

With a benson and hedge

Either way you’ll kill yourself slowly.

I don’t want to have a 

Reawakening,

A rebirth,

A reckoning everytime I break my heart over a girl. 

It’s lasting,

Laying,

In a car,

Fogged 

And warm.

That’s it.

These memories.

My words

Their short,

Because they’re….

A refraction of our nights.

Cold,

Faded,

Romantic,

Hurting,

Dim. 

Broken

That’s where I end up.

2 am.

In a city that sleeps,

While the rest of the world is up

With someone,

If she is,

I don’t ever want to find out.

But I know I might. 

Improve Our Days Now, 'Cause We Might Not Sleep Tonight.

I tell you this, because I know to be true

When you hang your life by a single thread

you're bound to fall through.

And when you'll look for those you'd hope would catch you.

It seems they rarely do.

You Better Run Faster Than The Storms Or The High Water That Remains

So these 2 solid B-sides I found not too long ago, One iss called "Hell Or High Water" and the other is "Heavier Things Remain" and of course both by Anberlin. They're both awesome tracks, I'll be honest I think these should have been on their latest album Dark Is The Way. Light Is A Place instead of some of the ones on there but oh well, all good regardless. 

Thought I'd start with these because they more appropriately express how I'm feeling right now, you can probably tell that from the poems a I posted a few minutes ago.

Now I'm usually not a Dubstep fan, most remixes are awful, I listen to a little bit of Skrillex or Bassnectar but that's about it. Now there is a time and place for Dubstep and I think this "Song Of Storms" remix by Ephixa is in the right time and place. It's a a really chill, slow track and chock full of nostalgia, take a listen.

Now as I am quite aware we are all probably very sick of remixes and covers of Foster The People's "Pumped Up Kicks" but this is an exception. This cover/remix by Cris Cab is really solid, the song really lends itself to the reggae tones and Cab's voice. This one's my favorite of the week, maybe the month, stumbled upon this yesterday and it's real solid and chill.
Well that's it for me guys & gals, until next post

Godspeed,
C.B. 

Past & Future Slam Together With Regression

R.I.P. Innocence

2 a.m.

A desperate text

A cry for help.

distant.

Drowsy & a bit

Lost

I grab the flashing screen,

?

And all at once

The girl I cared for

Scarred for

Now sings the song,

The words I hear,

My stomach turns

My face pale,

But I still long to help her,

My friend

Her love

Betrayal I’d once see

Crushed

I can see her tears

Miles away

Only wise words,

Wise? Say’s who?

Can I give

I wish it was more,

I miss the ring of

A joy once innocent

It’s gone

She gave that up

To the boy she did adore.

Gate D-2

The flash of tinged lights

LED glow of bad news &

Angry words,

Blankets our faces.

Jets dock and changing clocks

Bags running,

I forgot how stunning

I feel when I’m with you.

Fate’s missed the gate

She’s running late

Bu that’s alright

I’ll hold you tight

And drift away with you.

We’ll stay here,

These cramped chairs

laying next to you.

They called our plane,

We’ll take a train

I’m not moving away from you.

The lights blow out & gates crash

But here I am with you,

The attendant wakes me up

away,

Never will I leave this place

My head in the clouds,

halls rumble loud

Crack my eyes,

light shines bright

My eyes not used to your

light.

I shake you, wake you

You shudder and 

Look

I move your hair

We stare

Where were we even going?

'Ello all, Sorry it's been a while I haven't felt too inspired lately and it's been a weird past couple of weeks. I was having a great day until one thing set me off, figured this next poem was an appropriate for that very reason. It's Veteran's Day, so I'll throw another one having to do with that as well. Have a good one until the next post every one. Four poems in all to make up for my absence.  They're all related in one way or another, and they connect to my day.

I'll have some music for you guys up in a second and I'll update all the pages this afternoon.

Godspeed,
C.B. 

_____________________________

Trigger

Fitting it seems,

Coddling wet stage
an inappropriate place for a real life session
Wet? Rain the why,

And wet gunpowder never flares
But starts the thoughts

Oh trigger.

     The Title.

          Of scores and scores

                   Noble savagery poetry

          Bring forth my pain

Memories, fright

Heartache,
Sex,

& Blood.
Hate & you & us.
To never pick apart the sun again.

but I lied

          you see.

                   you’re seeing

                             proof.

One for my fallen brother

Drops of rain resound

Check the ground

The lightning cracks and

All is gone.

Split second

The clouds are dark & grey,

My dreams fade away

find the bottle in my belt

Swirl the glass, taste the air

Let it’s drops take my cares

Tip the glass and I breathe in

Taste the wheat & sulfur sin

Sigh of pain & relief,

Grimace

And a moan breaks the silence.

The amber stirs & hits the ground

Crows hear my thoughts

“This was for my fallen brother,

I pray to god he’ll have another.”

The crimson drips the iron rust,

My coldest fate within my touch.

Pull  the trigger, tilt the glass

This drink, was our last.

Smoky Lungs.

Pollution

Escape

For  a moment

The noise, the light

Un-spoken words

& lonely beds.

Throw down a thought

And lie in the grass.

Stare into the night

This place is clean, this place is pure

I thought…

I felt secure.

Stars speck the night,

Sleepless planes flight.

But I never wished to make light

The tears of a broken, starry night

I found my solace, but what’s the cause?

Planes fly by, I hear

But these birds I held so dear

I once was lost, I thought I found

My feet aren’t on solid ground

Now the page, too dark to see.

I lost some stars…

The nights are dreary.

Windmill 

Once I said this world’s polluted

Smog  $ greed, Sin’s deadly seed.

But now I hear a calming sound,

My feet freed up from this ground

The earth & I, our last goodbyes

No justice do these silly rhymes.

A sanctuary

The hands will run

through the clouds

My pen writes

But never in time.

Lose our part

rhymes. 

Over these stormy seas,

The windmill turns

My heart is free,

Until I find I land again

Waves of pain.

And Since I Am Dead I Can Take Off My Head & Recite Shakespearean Quotations.

Happy Halloween everyone!!
Nightmare Before Christmas is one of my all-time favorite musicals, movies, childhood memories/ anythings haha. It's my favorite Tim Burton movie and it's just soo damn good. Here's a song from it called "Jack's Lament". If you haven't seen it yet I suggest, no, demand you do it right away.

Godspeed,
C.B.

*Complacence brings Inspiration

Cool Glass of Water

A list,

A potential nickel rich.

The miracle kiss,

I’ve seen a long line

Repeat,

Offended

A long list

Salt on the ice

Burning lovemakker’s kiss

Maker’s mark,

Short stuff

On their knees and yet a smile

Why?

Onward

These long words

Because all the tweed

And nice ties

Fine vests & tux

Can’t buy me love

Oh.

Honey get me flies

So it’s time to try vinegar & lies.

A Warmth

But there’s twist

A turn,

The reverse

A warmth.
It’s not infinite

Not without pain

But it is existent

Step back

Look

And lack, listen.
Hold hands,

There.
There it is.

Among the nutmeg

And the Maker’s mark. 

______________

Where did I go wrong?
Seems sincerity only brings excommunication.

If that be the case then call me Hermit,

only one can hope of a Rose-apple awakening. 

Oh, the way her tears taste....

Ooo Oo.

Organization Is For The Sane

You’ll learn I lose a lot of things
One of those being my mind,
But don’t worry, I mean I don’t, this happens all the time
Which I forget also, one being time and the fact of forgetfulness

I should get a filing cabinet

But I’ll leave the cabinet to my president,
And armoire for me,
And some filing for my secretary.

I lost my darker pen
So red will have to do
I’ll write these lines,
and wish for times
I didn’t write for you.
But that’s not true

All it was was for you, her, she

It’s a reoccurring theme.
But now I write of deeper things,

And I’ve unstitched my heart from my sleeve

But you can’t put it in a folder or such

You see,
I lost my mind for you.
But now,
I lose it for me.

It Happened Again, I Woke Up Today & Everything Changed.

Operator

Drumming,

a sound of songs

the last of my thoughts,

it’s singing to me the last of reigning FM tunes,

I want control,

I want a dial

and a thicker yellow pages,

A phone book for the ages.

You see a blackbook ain’t so little

when your legs, open as your heart

and all the pain you bring upon yourself,

your sex is like an art

and though I’ve never sold a masterpiece

I think I know few things,

and just to paint some happy little trees

it’s a thought but not just that, I want a hug, a squeeze.

The thought that from behind me someone cares

and I don’t have to worry

about who I am

or what Im wearing, except for you. A sappy song.

A radio and green grass fields

sad serenades of girl I hoped could feel,

the same and I know it’s only been

one in a thousand

but I’m stuck here in the million and

seems like if I look for just one needle

I’ll prick a finger, and dirty my knees.

Should innocence still be important to me?

It seems nobody’s a virgin cept for me and well mary.

Afternoon everyone,
I don't have much to say but it's been a day or two since I posted so I figured it was about damn time you guys got another poem and hell cause I'm so nice I'll throw another one in here too as well as some music. HAPPY HALLOWEEN.

P.s. Expect a Halloween post :D

The swaying palms of a sulfur paradise

Take a step and watch the break
the last of a long line of false swipes

and coffee breaks.

I’m running out of wit, what I’ve become,
It’s making me sick.

my muse and the hate, 

seem to be inspired by pain

but I already knew this…

but I never wanted to self-inflict

oh my muse where are you?

I miss you?

Make my heart and mind

A spiritual right again.

There’s a lost boy

on the top of a roof and he’s going to jump.

But I can’t save him, I just have to write…

I have to write about him.

Have I scared away all who will catch a fall?  

with a heart of the slip of a step

and a Freudian yell will never bring the back.

If anything I’m just digging my grave,

if anything I’m looking for praise

on a sinking ship of my own masterpiece design

it’s driving me to sink and swim a life of nonexistent whim

wishing, wanting and a wet dream of lost life, love?

It’s such a commonplace call and I never wanted it to collect like this

you see my clever thoughts are like this

Its just a round and a round and around

that s all there is to feel, a wind that shakes the window pane…

it’s like a bad memory, a mercenary with the last of my regrets…

But it’s on the highest floor?

So I guess I want to be the boy now,

to stop the personifying and become an ex persona.

A distraction from a line of loss and libertines,

I wish I could hold on to the last

The last of this life and long road since but the pavement is cracked

and
I’ve lost your tip.

So take a road so traveled it’s a cliché, with a twist,

I’m tired of all these fake loving sinner’s bullshit

I don’t know if hell is my possibility but if I can,

I might retire there early. 

Mother Mother
"Chasing It Down"
Eureka